I have been deeply affected today reading the
http://scotlandformarriage.org/ website. It makes me so sad. So sad that such time and effort is poured into opposing gay marriage when the world is full of so many other problems.
I believe in freedom of speech, and so I cannot take issue with the purpose of the site, but I can make comment on its premises, which I believe to be fundementally flawed.
For me, the crux of the issue, and a source of great sadness to me, is the implicit suggestion that gay people are not part of God's family.
I do not accept that to be accepted into God's family as gay person I must be celibate. I do not see being gay as a burden or a temptation, I see it as a gift. It is a gift which has sometimes challenged me more than I thought I could bear. But it is a gift. It is a gift which forces me to speak out, for and on behalf of others.
I am a child of God. I am a child of God in a gay relationship. A gay Christian relationship.
If, as a Christian you find that hard to accept then know that I am praying that God will open your eyes. No-one but God gets to say who is saved.
"Marriage is the union of one man to one woman, for life, to the exclusion of all others. It is the best environment for raising children. We note that homosexual couples already have full legal rights available through civil partnerships."
Let me write it this way.
"Marriage is the union of of two people, for life, to the exclusion of all others. A loving home is everything a child needs to grow. We note that homosexual couples already have full legal rights available through civil partnerships, however for those couple who believe in God and who wish to marry in the eyes of God, Civil Partnership is not enough."
I do not wish to see the rights of conscience eroded for those who disagree with homosexual marriage.
I do not want anybody, any church or any denomination to be forced to do something which is against their conscience.
I would not wish to marry in a church which disagrees with the concept of gay marriage. That would undermine the entire sacrament. And for Christian couple who happe to be same-sex, marriage is a much of a sacrament as it is for straight couples.
I do, however hope that people who struggle with this issue examine their conscience and ask whether their issue is based in homophobia. Homophobia is not just going around assulting people because of their sexuality. Homophobia is denying that gay people are the same, and have same rights, as anyone else. Homophobia is as much of a sin (if that is a word you use) as racism, ageism, class snobbery and bigotry.
If gay people marry:
- The world will not end
- Couples will continue to divorce
- Families will continue to break up
- War will continue
- Famine will exist
- Children will still die of malnutrition and disease
Gay people will simply get married and continue living their lives as they do now.
There are much bigger issues in the world than gay marriage.
You see, gay people get to believe in God too. We have consciences. We have morals. We love. We get ill. We die. We look after our parents. We help our friends. We try to help and love people who are not our friends. We care about rights, about civil liberties, about justice. We eat, we drink. We are no different to anyone else.
Why would anyone think we would wish to see gay "lifestyles" "promoted".
Promoted? Why would anyone want to promote their sexuality?
I was born the way I am. Trust me, if I could have lived a straight, Christian evangelical life, it would have been a damn sight easier. But I couldn't. To have done so would have been a lie. I made a choice to be honest. To myself, to God and to others.
God does not care that I am gay.
God cares when gay teenagers kill themselves because they do not get the support and love they need. God cares when I am abused in the street. God cares when people are attacked because they look "gay". God cares when children use "gay" as a term of ridicule.
Schools have to be able to talk about being gay. They have to able to include it in sex-ed. Otherwise, more kids will take their own lives. How do you think young people questioning their sexuality, and part of some Scottish denominations feel right now? Sinful? Hated? Unloved? You bet. Some of them will leave the church and never return. They will be left believing that the church doesn't care about them, and by implication neither does God. To me, that is unpardonable.
Replace the word "promote" with "educate". Does it seem so bad now?
Let me leave you with some observations:
Straight couples who do not believe in God or who do not have an active faith are allowed to marry in church. Apparently that does not make a mockery of marriage as the church sees it.
Gay couples who believe in God and have an active faith may not marry in church. Apparently that would make a mockery of marriage as the church sees it.
Gay people can be Christians.
Sodom and Gomorrah is about a lack of hospitality, not about gay sex. Ask any theologian.
At the time of the Israelites, male rape was a form of punishment used by their enemies to humilate captured soldiers. Read Leviticus in that light.
If you are of the school of thought that every word of the Bible is true, and if you use Leviticus and similar passages to justify your position against gay marriage, please ensure that you also comply with all other Levitical laws. That should keep you out of mischief for quite some time.
Once upon a time, many Christians used the Bible to justify slavery. Unconscionable today - I would hope.
It is not up to me as a Christian to judge you or your opinions. I do not get to decide how your conscience responds. I just ask that if you struggle with this issue, you remember that we are not faceless "gays". We are your children, your cousins, your support workers, your Ministers, your grandchildren, your brothers and sisters, your friends, your paperboys and girls, your colleagues and acquaintances, your elders, your deacons. We are your brothers and sisters in Christ. We are all God's children.
